Friday, September 12, 2014

Keyboard Confessional: I Don't Want To Be Wonder Woman

Lately, I've been busy. Like,  near-exhaustion, no time to eat, what is a shower,  busy. Then again,  September is usually my busiest month. School starts for Beans, work usually picks up for me,  and things just generally seem to pile up quickly, until October, when we've had time to readjust our schedules.
This time is no different,  with a tiny exception. Make that a 17 lbs, 26 inch long exception. Baby Girl doesn't necessarily throw a wrench into my plans and habits,  but it's more like things pile up faster. Let me lay it out,  for better understanding.
My job is physically demanding, and high stress,  but gratifying.  I love what I do, truly. It's very difficult to decompress after hours,  especially when you only have the 20 minute drive home as 'alone' time. I try and sing along with the radio, or call my brothers (yay bluetooth!) and talk to them. But it doesn't feel like it's enough; as soon as I hit the bridge that goes into town, my focus is on the clock. Will I have time to swing by The Cave and give hubby a smooch? Am I going to find a parking space in front of the school so Beans will see me, and not go back inside and wander the school hallways? Can I hit the baby-sitter's in time to not get charged another hour? (She's pretty lenient on this anyway, but I still worry) OH MY GOD I HAVE SCHOOL WORK DUE TONIGHT BECAUSE IT'S WEDNESDAY/FRIDAY/SATURDAY AND THE GIRLS WON'T BE IN BED TIL 7 AND I HAVE TO BE IN BED BY 9 WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?! #studentmommypanic
And I forgot to set out my dinner to thaw/The crock pot wasn't even plugged in. Guess it's spaghetti night again.


It's come to my attention that most of us Working Mamas, whether it's from home or away, put too much on our plates. And it's not like we don't -try- to delegate! On the days my husband watches the girls, absolutely nothing gets done around the house. Nothing. And he says it's because he was so preoccupied with them that he couldn't do anything else. And nap time? That was his reward for giving them all his attention, so he played video games during downtime. I can get mad,  but that gets me nowhere. 

So, why do we feel like we have to do it all?

Seriously. Will the world fall apart if we just let things go? All I know is I just took about 30 minutes of time away to write this, instead of one more list, or cleaning one more dish, or folding one more pair of underpants. And now I feel better! Not really.