FINALS WEEK!

I promise, I will be writing more after this week. The semester will be over, and I will be able to write about all the things YOU love reading about! See you soon, Mamas!

One Pump, Two Pump, I Pump, You Pump

Hello out there to all my Mamas! I wanted to have a talk with you all about something near and dear to my heart. Literally! At least once a day, a plastic appliance is attached to my breasts, and I spend about 20 minutes getting intimate with these things. I'm talking about breast pumps, in all of their annoying glory.

I wanted to go a little more in-depth about breast pumps in this post because I got to talk about them a lot today! It gave me some time to reflect, and admit that pumping has grown on me. In fact, there are days when I'm glad to hook up to that machine, sit down, and let the pump do all the work! It's easier than a wriggling 9 month old, that's for sure. Pumps are also life savers when a newborn has nipple confusion, or nipple aversion! We dealt with the latter; once we came home, Isabel WOULD NOT latch. She cried and pushed away from me any time I tried.

First of all, I want to reiterate what I've said. Pump breaks at work are mandatory; the Department of Labor has a nice little page setup for this. FAQs about the Federal Law. Don't ever feel intimidated! You have to stick to your guns, Mamas. Hard, full boobs make it hard to concentrate at work, too. If anyone starts to complain, show them a milk-soaked shirt because you waited too long, and see what they say. (That usually works)

Second of all, I want to talk about types of pumps. The type can make the difference between frustration and elation!

Once the milk came in, we were overflowing!

That pump in the above picture is an AVENT manual pump. It's pretty nice, considering it has the attachment screw right onto the bottle. No transferring, no baggies! However, I had never pumped before, so I was struggling with getting any milk for a good week. This was one of the happiest days I had after giving birth to Baby Girl. But why was it so hard?

www.breastfeedingbasics.com !

A lot has to do with the fit. When my milk came in, I was engorged, as so many Mamas are. Unknowingly, I was pumping with a flange that didn't fit! I was left with only an ounce of milk after trying to pump for an hour, sore nipples, and aching breasts. I was bawling on skype with a good friend of mine who had a young daughter, 9 months old, at the time. She was my go-to for pumping because she started it once she went back, and was still going. She ordered a single electric pump from First Years. The silicone flange gave me some much needed comfort while pumping, and the electronic suction seemed more effective at drawing out that stubborn milk. Of course, a few days later, Baby Girl decided she LOVES boobies, and latched perfectly.

My Salvation!!

 I had to go back to work after six weeks, sadly, but I had already made my manager aware that I was going to pump because I was breastfeeding. We would make arrangements as needed, but I would need at least 20 minute breaks every four hours to pump. The electric pump made this transition easier, but I needed to empty both breasts during this break, so I pulled out the good ol' manual, and suffered through. It wasn't until I got a rash on my areola that I realized something was seriously wrong. 

After two visits with a lactation consultant, we found out that my nipples were WAY too big for the flange I was determined to use. So, to prevent any further damage to my poor, poor nipples, she suggested we go to the Health Department that afternoon, and get a rent-for-free Medela pump. I found a flange that worked for me.

This monster was HUGE! It was a double electric, which meant I could empty both easily. I bought a handmade pump holder, which the Breastfeeding Coalition made for the Health Department, for $5, and the pump was free! I lugged that thing to work for months. The only downside is the care and cleanup part of my pump break made the 15-20 minutes turn into 30-35 minutes. 

After steadily breastfeeding and pumping at work, my breasts, while still huge, became softer. Because of this, I believe, my manual pump finally fit me. I started taking the manual and miPump with me to work, and stuck to 20-25 minute breaks, which gave me plenty of time to clean up and pump enough for a decent bottle. 

I did the research for you, now all you have to do is click a link below for more information. And remember, Mamas: WE CAN DO IT!

Follow Emyle's board Breastfeeding on Pinterest.

CLICK HERE for more information on how to choose a pump flange size! It can get confusing.

Is it time to choose a pump? Pick the one that's right for you! CLICK HERE!

Thinking of breastfeeding without the boob? It's possible! CLICK HERE to see this amazing site!

Adventures in Breastfeeding #9 : Feeding Frenzy!

As we pass the  nine month matkwr,  I've decided that Baby Girl is actually a baby bear, filling up for hibernation. How else do you explain a sudden increase in feeding times, as well as my milk supply? Oh yeah, a growth spurt.

With Baby Girl's teething issues (still no teeth but SUPER sore gums), her latch has changed drastically. My previous post was one that described my frustrations with nipple blisters and bleeding cracks, and these changes have also driven her to latch on like in the pictures below.

Her continued curiosity of how can I stay latched today causes some very interesting nursing sessions. That is, at least until she falls asleep! Any other Mamas ever had a roaming nurser?

My Day Off

I'm a Hot Mess. We've already had this discussion. On my single day off each week, I'm even more ridiculous. And you wanna know why? 'Cause I'm a workin' mama that doesn't give a damn about pleasing anyone but the baby at my boob, and the six year old snuggled next to us. And let me tell you, Dumbo goes a long way.

Photo Credit: Walt Disney Studios

When it's my day off, I treat it like it's the single-most important day by being the laziest slob of a mom. Sort of.

I am more likely to wear my nursing bra than wear pants.

I run my errands in my nursing tank and shoes with no socks, or my Birkenstock slide-on clogs.
Take a nap? More like do school work, play a video game, and do a load of laundry all at once. Dishes? HA! Dishes make a noise that's like an alarm clock for babies. No, thank you.
I blatantly refused to look for the hairbrush.
My husband is afraid to ask 'what's for dinner?', because I might chew his head off.
I go between huge bursts of CLEAN ALL THE THINGS and Oh, god, I just want to sit and crochet in silence.
Nothing really gets done.
After hours are spent doing absolutely nothing but listening to music and playing with Baby Girl (See as: "Doing nothing"), guilt creeps in.
Lunch consists of soup and PB&J sandwiches, pureed veggies for Baby Girl, and my Cherry Limeade tea. Because calories.
Baby Girl takes a 2 hour nap, miraculously!
I moan and gripe about schoolwork between Raid queues in World of Warcraft.
Spaghetti night! Beans helps me serve, and tells us stories at the dinner table, using funny voices.
Baby Girl makes squealy noises; there's a competition on who gets louder.
I win.
Put girls down to bed. Breathe a sigh of relief.
Actually brush & floss teeth; also tweeze eyebrows.
Shower? Maybe. Maybe in the morning.

I go to bed just as tired as when I woke up, but I'm thoroughly satisfied that I spent time with my girls.

Adventures in Breastfeeding #8: When The Well Runs Dry

Baby Girl is fast asleep after a nursing session.

At eight months old, I can proudly say that my little one is still breastfeeding. She also takes a bottle at daycare, with one formula supplement bottle, while I'm at work. But that is slowly changing. My stress levels are higher, and her nursing demands are lower. Despite best efforts, and her ability to draw forth an incredible amount of milk from me at night, I can see the end coming soon.

I don't want it to end. I know that I wasn't going to breastfeed after she turned 1; I'm only protected by law for pump breaks until the child is a year old, and assisted living homes are so on demand and hands-on that I only get 15 minutes as it is. There are days when I have to choke back tears because, despite my teas and water chugging, I can only bring out 4 ounces total. The challenge is real, my friends.

I'm satisfied, slightly, by the fact that she eats three meals a day. Fruits and veggies, with some baby yogurt to help with the protein, on top of what I am able to give her through nursing. But I still feel like I am letting her down, because my supply is just not there.

For the past few nights, we've done our cuddle/nursing sessions, this time with their ending on a sour note. She always pulls away and cries, then roots around for the other breast. I know that two breast feedings are a good thing. To me, they feel like I'm not making enough.

When the well starts running dry, and stress runs high, things can get rough. I try to freeze what I can, so that when I'm not able to make anymore milk, I'll still have some for her. I will do the best I can, and she'll love me no matter what.


We just might have some issues with trying to latch-on through my shirts, instead of taking a bottle from Mommy.

Pinterest = Panic Attacks?

Hi, my name is Em.
I am addicted to Pinterest.

Facebook may come and go, but give me an electronic way to be a hoarder, and I'm all for it. I mean, where else could I keep all these awesome things I want to do, where they would be safe from children?
When I was first introduced to Pinterest, it was before Baby Girl got here. I hadn't even thought of being pregnant, actually. It was just an app that a friend suggested I download to 'keep my ideas in order' as they came to me, because while you're desperate to keep awake on third shift bed watch, you're willing to do anything.
So, I started off simple: Things I want in my closet, things about gardening, things about homesteading, and cute things for Beans.

After I became full-on pregnant, my board themes changed from gardening and homesteading (which are still a deep seeded desire) to healthy pregnancy tips and losing the baby weight. I'd like to think that Pinterest helped me with my desperate need to nest, and the overwhelming fact that I had been out of a job for two months before my due date arrived.

Now, I'm on Pinterest when it's 6:30 at night, and Baby Girl is nursing herself to sleep while we cuddle in my bed. Delilah is already in her PJs, and watching her shows/playing her video game until the area wide curfew alarm sounds at 8:30 p.m. (Otherwise, she doesn't have any say in what's on T.V., and I usually make her play with Baby Girl or outside)
I scroll through my 'Pin Feed', and feel odd pangs at certain images of what mommy and baby/kid are doing. 'Great ideas for things to do when the weather sucks and your kids are driving you nuts'. AWESOME! I'll keep that for the one day a week I have off of work, and there's four feet of snow outside.
Or, I'll do what I always do, and run errands until I'm exhausted, and keep appointments until dinner time.

The other day, I ran across an article about why Pinterest is awful if you're a mommy. I was intrigued, because pinning was my way of relaxing. It was my escape! I could read articles, look at pretty clothes, and oogle pictures of far off destinations that I will never reach, and I could do it all silently, as to not disturb anyone. But then I read the article, and those weird pangs came back.

"Pinterest has one simple message for mothers: You’re not doing nearly as much as you should. It snuck into our lives masquerading as a useful resource. It hypnotized us with images of brownies baked on top of Reeses cups and then blindsided us with a list of crafts we will never complete. We need to destroy it. With fire."

I may scramble for my Pinterest to get ideas about what to do with my kids, or fix for dinner, or organize my budget...

Ah, crap. It's still convincing me it's useful, and all some of the articles do is make me feel like a piss poor parent; there's always some DIY project or cute outfit that I could get my hands on if I just had the time to learn to sew!

That gal's right. Let's kill it. With fire.
In fact, I think I'll pin the article for my followers.

#addictiontwitch
#PINNER4LYFE
#almostDIYmommy
#DON'TSTOPBELIEVIN'!

Keyboard Confessional: I Don't Want To Be Wonder Woman

Lately, I've been busy. Like,  near-exhaustion, no time to eat, what is a shower,  busy. Then again,  September is usually my busiest month. School starts for Beans, work usually picks up for me,  and things just generally seem to pile up quickly, until October, when we've had time to readjust our schedules.
This time is no different,  with a tiny exception. Make that a 17 lbs, 26 inch long exception. Baby Girl doesn't necessarily throw a wrench into my plans and habits,  but it's more like things pile up faster. Let me lay it out,  for better understanding.

My job is physically demanding, and high stress,  but gratifying.  I love what I do, truly. It's very difficult to decompress after hours,  especially when you only have the 20 minute drive home as 'alone' time. I try and sing along with the radio, or call my brothers (yay bluetooth!) and talk to them. But it doesn't feel like it's enough; as soon as I hit the bridge that goes into town, my focus is on the clock. Will I have time to swing by The Cave and give hubby a smooch? Am I going to find a parking space in front of the school so Beans will see me, and not go back inside and wander the school hallways? Can I hit the baby-sitter's in time to not get charged another hour? (She's pretty lenient on this anyway, but I still worry) OH MY GOD I HAVE SCHOOL WORK DUE TONIGHT BECAUSE IT'S WEDNESDAY/FRIDAY/SATURDAY AND THE GIRLS WON'T BE IN BED TIL 7 AND I HAVE TO BE IN BED BY 9 WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?! #studentmommypanic

And I forgot to set out my dinner to thaw/The crock pot wasn't even plugged in. Guess it's spaghetti night again.

Crap.

It's come to my attention that most of us Working Mamas, whether it's from home or away, put too much on our plates. And it's not like we don't -try- to delegate! On the days my husband watches the girls, absolutely nothing gets done around the house. Nothing. And he says it's because he was so preoccupied with them that he couldn't do anything else. And nap time? That was his reward for giving them all his attention, so he played video games during downtime. I can get mad,  but that gets me nowhere. 

So, why do we feel like we have to do it all?

Seriously. Will the world fall apart if we just let things go? All I know is I just took about 30 minutes of time away to write this, instead of one more list, or cleaning one more dish, or folding one more pair of underpants. And now I feel better! Not really.

#waytootiredforthiscrap
#Mommyisalwaysmyfavoritejob